Local man finally runs out of toiletries he was bought for Christmas last year

Dundonald man Davy Gabbana has used up the toiletries he was bought for Christmas last year, according to reports.

The part-time joiner – also a ‘full-time mad bastard’ according to his Facebook account – only managed to spray his left armpit with Lynx Chocolate this morning before the aerosol ran done.

The 28-year-old also discovered his V05 texturising hair product was empty and resorted to using his wife’s hairspray.

He told us: ‘I’m just hoping to get through the next few weeks until next year’s batch of toiletries arrives’.

‘At first, I had a bit of a complex because everyone kept buying me aftershaves and deodorants for Christmas’, he confessed.

‘But I realised once you hit a certain age, no one has a fuckin’ clue what to buy ye, so a wee Lynx set is always a safe bet’.

He added, ‘From about January to June you’re swanning around like something outta GQ magazine’.

‘But July to October you start to ration your smellies and by November you’re using the wife’s hair mousse and Impulse body Spray’.

His mate, wee Ricky Rabanne, was the butt of many jokes in work this morning after an unfortunate incident involving his wife’s tanning moisturiser.

The 32-year-old ran out of his usual post-shave ointment and unwittingly used his wife’s gradual self-tanning lotion.

Unfortunately the carpet-fitter applied too much of the product to his face and by tea-break time the results were evident.

He said, ‘The boys were rippin’ the back clean outta me. I’d fuckin’ dyed my eyebrows the heap. My bake was more orange than a 12th morning in Sandy Row’.