A Dundonald woman is ‘fed up this day’, according to some shite she wrote on the internet this morning.
It follows yesterday’s claims about her being ‘Up to high doh’.
38-year-old Helen McMelter posted a deliberately vague Facebook status hoping to trigger an outpouring of sympathy.
Within seconds of posting, dozens of nosy bastards descended upon the comments section demanding ‘all the biz’.
Revealing what had led her to become so ‘fed up this day’, Helen wrote:
‘I’m always there for other people but the minute you need them they’re nowhere to be seen’.
‘At times like these you realise who you’re real friends are.
I’ll be looking after No1 in future’, she added.
Unsatisfied with the ambiguous nature of Helen’s rant, some friends wrote ‘Ring me Xx’ in the comments section.
‘She always does this’, claimed local gossip monger Kelly McDrama.
‘Sticks up her cryptic fucking posts then never fully explains them. I need details. Who’s said what? Who’s done what? Who’s bucking who?’
‘Fuck it, I’m ringing her’, conceded an impatient Kelly.
The Dundonald Liberation Army 
Mate, Helen is lit as fuck. I saw her last week giving it the rice to some Curry’s worker at Forestside. She was slabbering saying her boyfriend would get his knees done if she didn’t get her refund for £6 toaster. She said her kids would be without their grub until it gets replaced.
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