NI councils say they remain ‘on course’ to hit their target of 100,000 potholes on roads across the province.
The latest data shows the councils are falling short with just 65,000 potholes recorded on NI’s roads last year.
‘We’re doing everything we can to hit the 100,000 mark’, said a Belfast City Council spokesman.
‘Lack of investment, job cuts, half-arsed patching jobs by cowboy construction crews – you name it, we’ve done it’.
‘We’d also appeal to road users to do their bit’.
‘Make unnecessary journeys; wrap weather chains around your tyres; strap a grand piano to your roof rack if you f**king have to’.
In a bid to reach their target, Belfast City Council confirmed they will continue a policy of filling existing potholes with Play-Doh.
‘Play-Doh, plasticine, Weetabix – anything but f**king asphalt’, he cackled maniacally.
However, one motorist bemoaned what she described as a lack of effort on behalf of councils here to ensure the roads are in an absolute shit-state.
‘It’s a bloody joke. I’ve only had to replace one tyre since I started back to work on Monday. I’d expect at least three punctures by this stage’.
The Dundonald Liberation Army 