Ticketmaster crashes from SSE Covid 19 vaccine demand

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Covid 19 fans have complained after facing major problems buying tickets to get vaccinated in Belfast’s SSE Arena, it has emerged.

“Unprecedented demand” overwhelmed official ticket agencies, meaning many fans were to unable to access their websites or get through on the phone.

Ticketmaster said the demand was at least double that seen when tickets for Scooter’s planned comeback concerts at Custom House Square went on sale last year.

Health Minister Robin Swann this morning confirmed The Beach Club would reopen as a facility for those 60 and under who have not already been vaccinated.

“This will see everyone 60 and under being offered the vaccine and a free body shot off either Arlene Foster or Michelle O’Neill”, said the vertically challenged former UUP leader.

“It’s another significant step forward”, said Michelle O’Neill while lying on the bar and placing a tequila shot in her navel.

Meanwhile, hundreds of tickets appeared on eBay and other secondary websites at inflated prices.

Helen McMelter from Culross Drive in Ballybeen told us:

“I’ve been using two phones and our Jacob’s laptap all bloody morning”.

“Really annoyed there are people selling bundles of tickets on eBay for three times more that the ticket cost, sometimes more than that.”

“Keeping a wee eye on the Shankill Buy & Sell page in case I spot one”.

However, local anti-vaxxer and keen weed enthusiast Big Bap McBride is one person who will not be making use of the facility.

“God knows what’s in it”, he said while squirting a nasal tanning spray up his left nostril.

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