‘Time for a clear out me thinks’ announces local woman

A Dundonald woman is having a ‘Facebook cull’, it has emerged.

Kelly McMelter (28), made the announcement shortly after 9am this morning in a post which read:

‘Time for a clear out me thinks. Too many people carrying tales back to my ex’.

Kelly then concluded the post with three snake emoji’s.

Top of the comments section under the post was Kelly’s friend Natalie.

Natalie, who spends the majority of her mornings flicking between Kelly’s and Wayne’s Facebook pages wrote:

‘Just right hun. Hope I survive the cull’, followed by several praying hands and laughing emoji’s.

‘When I saw Kelly was deleting people, I almost dropped my phone’, explained Natalie.

‘I’d be lost if I didn’t have her page to stalk all day. I’d probably have to do something like seek daytime employment or concentrate on my own problems’.

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Kelly is adamant there’s a mole in the camp after information was leaked to her ex-boyfriend Wayne.

‘When I told Wayne’s he couldn’t have the kids this weekend cos they were sick, he was raging’, explained Kelly.

‘I was so stressed out by the row that I asked my Ma to mind the kids so I could go to Benedicts’.

‘I bumped into this lovely group of fellas from Sandy Row and I posed for a few selfies with them’.

‘When I uploaded the photos to Facebook and set them to public, I never imagined for one second my ex would find out and get upset’.

‘Like, I know I voluntarily upload every single aspect of my existence to a public platform which is potentially accessible to millions of people – but I’m a very private person at the end of the day’, she added.


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